A Very Interesting Day at the Ballpark

I meant to type about this game some time ago, but I didn’t. That’s also normal. But oh well! This is just storytime with no real life lessons or opinions. Just an entertaining day at the ballpark!

So about two weeks back, I went to the SF Giants game and planned to meet my friend Matt (@iWaffles) there. Since he was running late, I left his ticket at Will Call (best feature ever) and wandered inside to our bleacher seats.

1. In our seats were a pair of girls who, apparently, didn’t understand the difference between 0 and 00. The difference is the presence of another 0 (or not). Playing the matching game, these designate two separate rows. Not that hard, right? They actually had the better seats, apologized and promptly moved down. Cool. Nice girls. We chatted a bit.

2. I picked this game specifically because it was against the Diamondbacks. I’m a fan of a player on that team because of an encounter at a game during the previous season in which we exchanged words and he threw me a ball. It went like this:

Montero warming up in the outfield.
My friend Bobby and I hanging out in the bleachers just watching.
Montero faces our direction to retrieve the ball
Me: Can I have a ball!?!
Montero: (Jokingly) NO!! *Proceeds to warm up, almost pegging a kid walking onto the field with a class to sing the national anthem*
A few more tosses occur
Montero: (In our direction) Hey!! *Throws me the ball from CF*

Bam. Fan made. I was so excited!!

Another line of children walked by for the national anthem this time, too, and I think he was careful to not endanger any 😉

This time, I yelled and jumped up and down. But alas, he did not even look over. It was still worth a try!

3. A couple comes up to their seats and finds the girls from (1) in them. Usher Man steps in and discovered that they’re, once again, in the wrong seats. Correct row, correct seat numbers…Wrong section. Sigh.

4. The previous day, I put some concert tickets up for sale on Craigslist because I couldn’t make the show. It was between missing a second week of softball or Bon Jovi. To be a team player, I picked softball. One of the offers was from someone who lived in Millbrae. Coincidentally, I was headed that direction for the game. Even more coincidentally, that person was also going to the game. So I meet Craigslist -dude-number-1 at the top of the section to close the deal. Of course, that’s when my friend arrives at the seats. Brb Craigslist? He probably didn’t even believe me..

5. Rowdy Dude to my upper left was trying to get his friend’s attention while on the phone. To do so, he just stuck his middle finger way up, and told friend to look for it. Smoooooth. Usher Man had a talk with him about rude gestures, language and how this is a family establishment. Way to go, Usher Man! It was hilariously quiet while he was getting reprimanded. Then he went off to mock Usher Man by repeating the things he wasn’t allowed to do. STFU.

6. Two girls sat in the row in front of us, and one clearly had had too much to drink. She kept yelling at random players, leaned so far over the wall that you could probably tap her and she’d fall over, Usher Man had to ask her to sit down repeatedly, and she tried to make friends with a 5 year old boy sitting next to them.

7. Rowdy Dude’s (5) friends managed to find and visit him later in the game. As they hugged, I took lady friend’s ass to the head. Just what I’ve always wanted. Later, she picked up and started eating my hours-old garlic fries leftovers I had placed on the bench next to me. I let her chomp and share em for a bit as I thought about how entertaining this entire game experience was. She mentioned something about the fries, and I turned to her and said, “don’t worry, I’m not sick or anything” and smiled. She had such a horrified look on her face, I wish I had been able to snap a photo of that moment. She hardly said much the rest of the game.

8. When we tied it up in the 9th, Drunk Girl (6) claimed to be the Giants’ lucky charm because they’d never lost at a game she was at. We lost the game in the 11th. I laughed to myself. A lot.

9. Throughout the game, I had been in contact with another person who was looking to purchase my second pair of Bon Jovi tickets. Essentially, our living and current locations were swapped. He was near where I live, watching the Sharks game on TV, and I was near where he lived, watching the Giants game. The second Craigslist deal took place after midnight in the parking lot of a Jack in the Box. Probably not the safest of circumstances, but just added to the entertaining awkwardness of the evening.

This concludes the story of the random things that happened outside of the baseball game itself. It was probably the most entertaining baseball experience I’ve had!