How to Receive Really Good Customer Service

Have you ever needed help with something?
Yes. You have. Don’t even try to pretend.

Were you unsatisfied with your customer service, but the problem did get solved?
If so, you:

1. Didn’t read the initial information given to you
2. Probably made zero attempts to look up information on your own
3. Were probably rude to the rep
4. and/or you were … here it comes.. ASKING THE WRONG QUESTIONS

It’s very difficult to help someone if they can’t provide details leading up to the issue. If you don’t know where to start, that is okay, too, but don’t act like you do.. That just makes things even more confusing, walks everyone in circles, and takes even longer to find a solution together. Own up and ask for help. We’ll start at the beginning, sure, but I guarantee that will go faster than if you pretend you know what you’re talking about. Trust me, it’s obvious when you’re making shit up. We know our processes better than you do…isn’t that why you’re calling?

Being professional, detailed and nice will get you what you need MUCH faster than any other alternatives. When someone asks you a question nicely, you’re more likely to be nice right back. RESPECT!

To drastically improve the quality of customer service you receive, follow these simple steps, BEFORE calling your service representative:

1. RTFM

If you really, REALLY can’t figure it out on your own, here are some questions to ask yourself to help identify what the problem actually is:

• What steps are you taking before you encounter the issue? Consult TFM again to make sure you’re actually doing it right.
• What do you expect to see?
• What do you actually see?

After exploring the ideas in the above questions, go ahead and send an email or call, providing the details you’ve discovered.

During the call/email:

1. Report your findings clearly and in detail. Use the correct terminology you’ve learned by RTFM. You want a solution quickly don’t you?*
2. Be nice. We like helping, but not if you’re going to be a whiny bitch about it. Golden Rule applies here.**
3. Act professional, be accountable. I’m sure you want to be taken seriously***
4. Don’t demand things. It’ll make us less likely to want to give it to you.****

*The following questions/comments are 100% worthless:

• It doesn’t work [Can you describe your issue in further detail?]
• _____ is broken. Can you fix it? [Can you describe your issue in further detail?]
• I can’t find _____ / I don’t know where _____ is. [Have you even tried looking for it?]

**Sure, it’s my job to help you, and I WANT to help you.. However, it’s not my job to entertain your idiocy, disrespectfulness and/or lack of common sense and intelligence. Don’t waste your time or my time (but at least I get paid for my time). Like I said: Golden Rule. We learned this in preschool.

***Ask questions like this:

i have a question i just enroll in class but when i go the  [company name removed for privacy purposes] student portal when  i click on  click my course sites i dont  show any my classes

I’ll laugh at you and want to answer you like this:

i have a answer there is processing period after registering it will come later i promise

****Say things like this:

It think this [policy] must change to …

or…

CAN YOU PLEASE HELP

NOT MUCH TIME and I still need to take a shower.

I don’t give a shit what you think. The end.